26 -07-2018.
Dear J,
Today, you turn nineteen and you really do not like birthdays, especially yours. It is weird to feel unfulfilled at such a young age but you just cannot shake off the notion that you are wasting. Don’t blame yourself, blame your generation, you grew up too fast [and carried all the baggage and responsibility of growth too].
Today, you turn nineteen. It has been a crazy ride, highs and lows, from being the brightest child in class to being part of the teeming crowd. One of the boys with potential but not putting it enough energy and work for it to manifest. From being the kid to a kid. From where I stand, it does look like everything has gone downhill.
Today, you turn nineteen and in this time, you have grown. From a fourteen-year-old boy who believed women to be dispensable property to a feminist [doesn’t it feel good to say that?]. From a docile Christian swallowing all the words from the pulpit to a person who learnt to question in order to evaluate and strengthen his faith. From a boy who believed that he could go through life on the strength of his “intelligence” but learning the hard way that putting in work was equally important. From going into the university on the wings of fantasies and being brought down to earth fast. You have grown into a person with principles, not one who reflects the beliefs of those around him.
Today, you turn nineteen and you have no idea what you want to do with your life. All you know is that it is going to work out somehow, it has to. It is a lesson you have learnt through rushed assignments and projects perilously close to the deadlines [as I type this, you have a position paper for an MUN to write and a test on Monday, two tasks you are ill prepared for].
Today, you turn nineteen and you have learnt the importance of relationships. No man is an island. Cliché, but true. In this time, you have made friends and acquaintances. You have also learnt to let go of connections that do not have benefits despite how in love you are with the idea of these affairs.
Today, you turn nineteen. You have a lot on your mind now and you cannot be free and fun oriented all the time. You are better and at the same time, you are worse.
Today, you turn nineteen and despite the constant protests of your mother, you are still lazy and. But it will work out, it has to.
